"I'm just saying - you probably are going to take a while to internalize that you don't have to do that anymore, not just in your brain, but, you know, your gut. What's the Black Death?"
He looks down at his tummy and presses into it with black-tipped fingernails.
"Deadliest pandemic in human history." He says, distracted. "A third of a continent died, it was hilarious. But it meant I was running around like a nutcase."
He squirms, making a face. But BJ answers, because Hange is doing him a favor by listening.
"Because I was a guide to the Netherworld. If people didn't read the book - and trust me, a lot of people couldn't read back then - I had to go Upstairs and lead the newly deads home."
"That job was a fucking nightmare. Can you imagine being some boring-ass farmer who just died from the bubonic plague and he doesn't wanna leave his stupid breather family and then I show up trying to force him through the door? Got one too many pitchforks to the face.
And that wasn't the worst of it. All the crying and carrying on. Jesus christ. Why are we talking about the past?"
"I asked about it." So she'll move on. "Anyway: being less selfish. Maybe a good thing to do would be, I don't know... maybe ask your friends sometimes about nice things you could do for them? If they're having a good time? Paying attention to whether someone is actually having a good time when they're interacting with you, or trying to escape? You tend to want to hang on to people, but sometimes you'll actually build a stronger bond with people if you show you're willing to let them go..."
"Yeah," Hange says calmly. "If someone looks like they're feeling tired, or they need to do something else, or if they have to go home - you have to let them go."
"I don't know. Maybe if you live in a time of peace..."
Hange shrugs, and drags herself away from the contemplation of her lost comrades.
"Anyway - if you want to become less selfish, think about how you can offer your friends what they want and need. Be good to them. Make sure they're really having fun with you and ease up if they're not."
"Sometimes you won't and people won't tell you. Watch body language. If someone's pulling away from you, let them go, or hold them loosely enough in the first place that they can pull away. Eyes and shoulders are good things to watch... I'm a bad person to ask about this, honestly, because I'm not always good at it."
"Yeah." Dry. "And you get why that is, right? Because someone who is predisposed to dislike you is probably not the best person to build a lasting relationship with."
She swallows her laugh, and then shakes herself a bit, still in place.
"Well - there's things you need to think about adjusting, to maintain your relationships better. Selfishness, for instance, is something that will exhaust people and eventually drive them away from you, because it means you're sustained, and they're not... they'll go to what sustains them. But there's parts of you that aren't wrong, but just aren't to everyone's taste, and your most successful relationships will probably be with people whose taste they are."
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"But I wasn't trying for most of it! The Black Death took up so much of my time in the 14th century!"
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"Deadliest pandemic in human history." He says, distracted. "A third of a continent died, it was hilarious. But it meant I was running around like a nutcase."
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"Because I was a guide to the Netherworld. If people didn't read the book - and trust me, a lot of people couldn't read back then - I had to go Upstairs and lead the newly deads home."
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"So you took care of them?" Well, who knows what "taking care of" constitutes for Betelgeuse, but she could see him being good at this, actually.
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"That job was a fucking nightmare. Can you imagine being some boring-ass farmer who just died from the bubonic plague and he doesn't wanna leave his stupid breather family and then I show up trying to force him through the door? Got one too many pitchforks to the face.
And that wasn't the worst of it. All the crying and carrying on. Jesus christ. Why are we talking about the past?"
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Hange shrugs, and drags herself away from the contemplation of her lost comrades.
"Anyway - if you want to become less selfish, think about how you can offer your friends what they want and need. Be good to them. Make sure they're really having fun with you and ease up if they're not."
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"How do you know if they're really having fun or if they're lying that they are and really just stalling until they can find the exits?"
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"I'm great at noticing when people are scared of me! Maybe I can twist that into 'general disgust or dislike'!"
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"Yeah, tell that to my ex-wives. I get it, I get it."
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"Just the two."
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She swallows her laugh, and then shakes herself a bit, still in place.
"Well - there's things you need to think about adjusting, to maintain your relationships better. Selfishness, for instance, is something that will exhaust people and eventually drive them away from you, because it means you're sustained, and they're not... they'll go to what sustains them. But there's parts of you that aren't wrong, but just aren't to everyone's taste, and your most successful relationships will probably be with people whose taste they are."
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"The new kid is exactly my type. Undead, cute, likes murder and musicals. Rhys is pissed."
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"No, he's right. I did him dirty. I broke it off with baby vamp and I'll go write an apology song to Stringbean."
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